A Step Back

Hypothetically speaking.

socialretrogression — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 22:34:52 +0000

It Is There; Therefore I Want It

socialretrogression — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 16:21:19 +0000

There is a famous saying used by many people [half of which don't understand it at all] that reads: “Less is more.” A simple enough concept, one would think. However if one were to venture down any aisle of a warehouse store, the “life lesson” seems less applicable. Really, who would buy a jar of mustard standing a foot and a half tall? Who could possibly use that much of one condiment before it spoiled?The truth is, the very appeal of excess is that is is just that: excessive. People, Americans especially, are consumed by the idea of more of everything and anything. Some would call it preparation, a simple preventive action to ensure there is always enough of the desired object; I would call it gluttony. In the modern world we strive for more material wealth, usually because it indicates a higher standard of living and expectations. But the question of the matter is, is it necessary? Why waste good food? Money? Effort? America as a whole is selfish. Its people are captivated with the idea of desiring something larger and then attaining it. While the dream is exceptionally noble, the outcome as indicated in both literature [such as with Gatsby] and everyday life is rather ruinous.

The desire to have something–anything–simply for the sake of having it, typically results from an impulse. The amount of candy bars bought at the last minute in Walmart, the junk items that pollute my own house from my father’s garage sale adventures, and the option to “supersize” a fast food meal [if not the fast food itself] all serve as proof. It is there; therefore I want it. Though it may sound like a line from a scene of Shakespearian text, the statement is simply the current mentality of the American public.

Perhaps there is some pyschological reasoning behind the gluttony. Perhaps the fear of loss, the fear of having bought an inadequate amount creates the problem. As sterotypical as it is, the mother of the household will typically be the one to venture out to the grocery store. Assuming most have visited one at some point in time, one can admit they can be quite daunting places. As the mother moves swiftly from aisle to aisle, planning for meals run through her mind, as well as the needed supplices for the coming alloted time before her return to her current position. Surely that mother wishes to provide enough for her family. Her thought process: Better to have more than have less and run out. [I'm sure you've heard a mother say that at some point.] Yet more times than not, some food products do go to waste, hidden behind the “more desireables” [i.e. chocolate].

The amount of food wasted in the United States alone could save countless lives from starvation. The money wasted on frivalities could be used to advance technological aid to people everywhere. Perhaps worse than the unnecessary desire for more is the fact that we are aware of our faults. Eating contests are the physical manifestation of gluttony–not to mention unhealthy and disgusting. Yet those eating contests still exist and people still, oddly enough, seem to find them entertaining.

A super-huge mustard jar is not the epitome of all things evil. It is however a symbol of the slefishness of a glutonous America. Whoever first uttered “less is more” is much wiser than the modern world believes.

Behind the Looking Glass

socialretrogression — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 22:43:40 +0000

Depression cloats my mind. Or perhaps…depression is too vague a term. For I am not depressed in the usual sense of the word. I’m depressed for those around me. And thus I suppose the more appropriate word for my current state of mind is “worried”.

I’m concerned with so many things right now. Some of them directly affecting myself and partially under my control, some of them indirectly, leaving me utterly helpless. Obviously the latter of the two lead to more worry and frustration.

What makes the situation even more intolerable is my inability to articulate how I’m feeling. The best way in which I can describe it, is with the symbolism of a glass wall. The things I long for, the few things I want are on the seemingly unattainable other side. I can see them; I can watch as they sit there so far from myself. But I can do nothing to reach them. I’ve no way to scale a surface that is so slick. I’ve no way to go under. I’ve no way to go through. At least not yet. I feel as if right now I’m just waiting for someone to come along with a hammer.

Then the wall will shatter and I shall find peace once again.

//*Disclaimer: I did not take that picture. I do not know who the photographer is.

“How have you been?”

socialretrogression — Fri, 21 Mar 2008 19:00:35 +0000

I’ve come to realize I hate those words. I really do. Perhaps hate is not the appropriate term.

But hearing those words–or worse, reading them–means only one thing: the person you’re now conversing with hasn’t spoken with you in a long time. Now whether it is through your “fault” or theirs makes no real difference; either way the blame is on both people.

This thought came to mind as I recalled I haven’t spoken with a friend of mine in months. Months. At first it simply left me saddened; I hadn’t had a chance to see the individual, let alone talk with them.

And then as I recalled our last conversation I realized that was how he’d started it.
And all I’d been able to do was smile and answer with the lie of “good”.
Why do we do that?

As a whole, if you were to ask anyone how they were their most likely answer would be “Oh, I’m fine”. But how often is that really true? Probably less often than it’s fact. Is it that we feel a need to hide our true feelings for the sake of a reputation? Is it a lack of respect enough for the person asking to give them a straight answer? Or is it perhaps that we’re scared that if we’re honest with the person then we have to be honest with ourselves?

Here lies the other dilemma; the second option is no easier. If I give myself time to ponder over an actual answer to the previous question I often times am left fidgeting for several painstaking, silenced moments. If they have reason to ask that question, then they haven’t seen me in quite a while, obviously. So how could I possibly recount how I’ve been over that amount of time when I often have trouble recounting how I’ve felt for the past hour? So much can happen in an hour–a minute even. It makes the question almost impossible to answer truthfully.

I know this all sounds horribly pessimistic. Really, I’m just trying to reason my way through it; I tend to find it easier to do when writing. The words simply come when I type, so I figured this case would be no different.
Yet now I feel as though I’m simply talking in circles. Perhaps the dilemma is merely a cycle of misdoings.

I suppose the first fault was my lack of communication. Correction: I know that was my first fault. However, by mathematical technicalities, a social life in which one never loses contact with anyone they know would be near impossible if not completely time-consuming. One would never have time to eat, let alone sleep.
So how can I possibly keep contact with these people and avoid that dreaded question?

Thoughts? Feelings? Comments?
Anyone?

Musical therapy.

socialretrogression — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 02:02:59 +0000

I was surfing through songs, trying to find good ones to add to my playlist the other day. I came across one by Flyleaf. It’s called ‘Supernatural’. Now I wasn’t extremely familiar with their lyrics, so I was looking them up so I could read while listening. I pulled up the words as the song began to play. Then tears just started falling. The words were so beautiful. People that had lost everything, that had every right to give up hope…they still bowed their heads to pray. To thank God. To give Him praise. It humbles you, as my mom said. As a whole, we whine about so much. Such petty things…

He is teaching me what love really means.

I suppose this post will be centered on music.
Flyleaf in particular.

Another song I feel needs mention is “I’m So Sick”. The song doesn’t have the same effect as the previously stated…but it’s still so refreshing. What first captured me was the sound. To think a woman that has such a melodic and pretty voice can scream with such intensity is thrilling. Then, again, I took a look at the lyrics. There is a wonderful message there, one that needs to be heard. In this world, corrupted by the people that live in it, we see sins, crimes, acts of disgrace so often it becomes almost normal. We sit mindlessly watching, listening to the screams of the weak. Yet when we realize what is happening, we make no movements. Really the problem is an infectious disease, and we’re all suffering from it’s toxins.

This invasion makes me feel…
Worthless
Hopeless
Sick

I want to be cured.
I need my Savior for that.

The very first.

socialretrogression — Wed, 12 Dec 2007 18:24:54 +0000

So I’m a little new to this.
I’ve had your basic blog. You know, the silly ones on Myspace where you decide to just post random things because it’s there.
Hopefully more will come out of this one. I really, really doubt that I’ll have subscribers or anything–that anyone will read it for that matter. But I’m alright with that. This is mainly for me. :]

So I suppose on the off chance I do get at least one lonely person reading this…I should give at least a little information on what I hope to accomplish with this.

Well really, it’s a spot for me. For my thoughts [duh]; for those random moments where a stray idea runs through my mind; for the tiny events that would be left untouched without it.
If I dare to call it that, I’ve begun to have an “awakening” of sorts. Or perhaps I just like the term because it happens to be related to that book we just finished in Literature. Who knows? Either way, I’ve begun to realize things that I’d never given second thought to. The things overlooked. That’ll definitely be a central theme. As well as the beauty of life. I’ve determined that God has an incredible way of having planned life so that it is insanely beautiful; we just have to take A STEP BACK to see it. Haha, yeah, you guessed it. That’s where the blog name came from. Original, right?

Well anyway, that’s the basic gist. Not that that made much sense…at least I doubt it did. But for now that’ll have to do. And hopefully my posts will be at least more than this pathetic one. This is almost a waste of time. Only almost though.

I’d actually intended to add something I jotted down the other day. It was one of those insightful moments. Strangely enough, I tend to have quite a few of those while just staring at this screen. I doubt that’s good. But at least I’m having those moments. Better than nothing. Maybe they’ll start to come more frequently thanks to this.

On a side note–because it just popped into my head–I figure this blog will also improve my writing. Not that I’ve anyone to try and impress [yet] but maybe one day. :]

So anyway; that thing I was going to add in:
I’m trying to look at things in a more positive light. My sarcasm gets in the way of that a lot of the time. And I whine too much. I know that. And I need to fix it. So I’m working on it.
It seems that’s how a lot of society is nowadays. If it doesn’t come easy, we’ve got a complaint. If it doesn’t come perfect, something’s wrong. We take things way too seriously, to extremes at times. I’m not proposing we all just sit around and let Life hit us in the face as it flies by…but perhaps focusing on the good instead of the bad. The pros instead of the cons.
No one wants to be around someone that’s negative all the time.

Another goal I’ve decided on is trying not to live for a few select days. My sister actually brought the idea to my attention. The other day we’re driving along and she asks, “Does it feel like we’re always living for just a few days?” Without really thinking, I opened my mouth to utter a “no”. But then I gave a moment of thought to the idea. And I realized it does. I think everyone’s a victim, but I see it particularly among my peers. Before we have a chance to worry about how we’re going to greet the first person we meet that day, we’re thinking about that one test that’s been controlling our minds for the past week. Or that horrible grade that got us grounded. Grades are important….but not that important. Always, our first goal should be to glorify the Lord in whatever we do. That means giving our all on everything. Embracing the day. Every day. Not just the weekends; the parties; the end of the grading period so we can have a break.
I already know this will be a hard task for me. It’s always easier to preach the sermon that keep away from the sin. But I’ll be working on it. I plan to wake up to each day, smile on my face, and thank God for the another day to be alive.

So here’s looking to tomorrow….whatever may come. :]

Fin.